How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Randomize
