i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
