yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
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