yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
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