I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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