the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
