i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
