dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Randomize
