Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
