She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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