is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize
