8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
