I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
i came on her dog
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
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