Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
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