I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
