Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
