feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
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