No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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