we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
