may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm too high and old for this...
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
as a side note pls kill me
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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