I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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