Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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