OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
