What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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