There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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