I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me