I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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