i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
