TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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