Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I think I sprained my soul last night
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
