Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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