We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
