she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
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