Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
