Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
Randomize
