so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
