There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Randomize
