I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I still have a little drunk in my system
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
