It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
