Are we in a gay sports bar?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
