I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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