Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
