I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Last time i carry you out of a forest
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize