The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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