ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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