Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
