good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
