Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
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