Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
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That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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