Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
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