this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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