Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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